230am. I woke up and he is still gone.
I miss him so much. I said a prayer to him and hoped to fall back asleep but all I could do was think about every little thing. Holding him the hospital, the way he ate, the way he slept on my chest. And how I am never going to get to feel his little body again.
When they brought him to us in the hospital. Holding him was such a comfort because when I put his hand in mine he felt alive. I was just waiting for him to wake up. By the time we said goodbye his little fingers were stiff and ice cold.
Now all I can think about is every memory I didn't get the chance to make with him. His first smile and laugh, learning to walk, eating his first foods. I came outside because it makes me feel closer to him. Like there is one less thing between us. I still miss him just as much though. The pain I am feeling is unfair and it hurts so much.
Libby, Missouri, US
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